Friday, April 8, 2011

when upon lives billows you are tempest tossed. when you are discouraged thinking all is lost. count your many blessings name them one by one. and it will surprise you what the Lord has done.
so amid the conflict whether great or small. do not be discouraged God is over all. count your many blessings angels will attend. help and comfort give you till your journey's end.

be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake to guide the future as he has the past.
thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake; all now mysterious shall be bright at last.
be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.


Yesterday we received some really rough news. (Our home appraisal wasn't good. Catastrophic is more the correct term.) It was/is a real blow to our dreams. Kind of like a real hearty kick in the crotch. It's still rough and the pain is awfully raw... it's hard to describe. But mostly you feel all together crushed.
We are definitely still reeling and have no idea where to go from here or what to think. We had a lot of "plans"/dreams riding on what we felt was a fairly certain outcome only to be drastically "put in our place" as it were.
For me I feel stupid for having thought it was a feasible solution. I feel very much "put in my place" which feels very much like a place of shame and little worth. And I feel like the light at the end of the tunnel as it were keeps getting further and further away, where it seemed so close now it feels that even if I squinted I couldn't quite make it out. Mostly I feel without hope, without the desire to dream because it seems pointless. It's a gross feeling.

These two hymns are what I am holding on to. I still know that my Father in Heaven is mindful of us. I still know He has a plan for us. And, in no way, do I feel cheated or robbed by the Lord. In the exact opposite, I feel like my cup "overfloweth" with His blessings. I know these material dreams don't really matter but I still feel very hurt and confused and, yes, literally crushed from the inside out, but that is not His fault. It's not really anyone's fault except maybe my own.
I pray not that the Lord will make it all better but that He will make me all better.

A parable is told of a farmer who owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer's well. The farmer heard the mule 'braying' - or - whatever mules do when they fall into wells. After carefully assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided that neither the mule nor the well was worth the trouble of saving. Instead, he called his neighbors together and told them what had happened...and enlisted them to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery.

Initially, the old mule was hysterical! But as the farmer and his neighbors continued shoveling and the dirt hit his back...a thought struck him. It suddenly dawned on him that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back...HE SHOULD SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP! This he did, blow after blow.

"Shake it off and step up...shake it off and step up...shake it off and step up!" he repeated to encourage himself. No matter how painful the blows, or distressing the situation seemed the old mule fought "panic" and just kept right on SHAKING IT OFF AND STEPPING UP!

You're right! It wasn't long before the old mule, battered and exhausted, STEPPED TRIUMPHANTLY OVER THE WALL OF THAT WELL! What seemed like it would bury him, actually blessed him...all because of the manner in which he handled his adversity.

THAT'S LIFE! If we face our problems and respond to them positively, and refuse to give in to panic, bitterness, or self-pity...

The adversities that come along to bury us usually have within them the potential to benefit and bless us!

"SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP"

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