Thursday, June 2, 2011

Strange Things Are Happening

(does anyone have that song playing in their head because I sure do. Please tell me someone else actually knows the song I'm talking about... if not that would just be awkward.)

Brace yourselves, this post gets a little PG13... you've been warned.

I was sitting at the computer doing some research for a project I'm about to do, when Kameryn comes over with some black things and asks me what they are.

At first glance they look like some of Brandon's black church socks that the dog had gotten too.

And then, the more I watched her finagle them the more apparent it was that the mystery object was not an object appropriate for young eyes and hands...
especially considering the fact that I had NO IDEA where they came from and they definitely weren't mine.

Had they been mine it would have still been awkward but not nearly as awkward as it actually was considering I didn't know who they belonged to.
(and when you are fingering things like that you had better know who they belong to and be okay with the fact that you are touching them...)


So that brought me to a perplexing situation:


Apparently, upon questioning my children, we came to the conclusion that 3 pairs of black g-string underwear miraculously appeared on the coffee table.

No lie.

Appeared out of thin air.


Right onto the coffee table that had held no g-string underwear mere minutes before.


See, this is where things get extra awkward. If they weren't mine (which they weren't) they had to belong to someone else.

My children really like our neighbors.

A lot.

My children also like to visit our neighbors a lot.
You know, because they like them.
And sometimes my children visit the neighbors without them knowing.

Our neighbors don't share our same religion and so they also don't share our same "taste" in underwear... and we all have clotheslines... So there was always that option...

Okay, I'm sorry, but how does one go about knocking on their neighbor's door and saying something like

"Excuse me, but did my children happen to steal 3 pairs of black g-string underwear from your yard?"

Honestly, how do you put an un-awkward spin on a conversation like that?

Um, easy,

you don't!



So I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Do I do the right thing and make every possible effort to return something when you know it's not yours?
Or, do I do the more comfortable thing and let other people's personal personal belongings remain none of my business.

Pretty sure you've got a good guess as to what I was going to do.
(or what I was NOT going to do)


But honestly, out of thin air?

No one has even the slightest clue as to where they came from or how they managed to get on the coffee table?

They just appeared?



I'd like to say stranger things had happened around here:


but actually, no.


No they haven't.




For everyone's peace of mind, after a lot of sloothing, we now know,
without a shadow of doubt,
that the underwear actually arrived in a box, addressed to us, from Target.
While I had only ordered swimsuits for the children
(and the receipt attested to that)
they had included this very special prize in the box.

Like a box of cracker jacks!




On the very positive side, now Brandon has a new "swimsuit!" too. ;)
(three actually...)

7 comments:

  1. Hilarious - I am laughing so hard.

    Love you

    ReplyDelete
  2. that post was from me, not lydia...i'm not sure why blogger keeps leaving comments in her name.
    -gwen

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh gosh. I cannot stop laughing. Hilarious! Thanks for putting a little pep in my step this morning!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree with Gwen... Story would have been so much better if you had tried to "return" to the neighbors. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. And now I have that song stuck in my head... thanks a lot sister!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Craziness! That is so funny! Talk about free samples. Always nice to get a fun surprise when you order things in the mail. Good to know the children DID NOT get them from the neighbor.

    ReplyDelete
  7. This post TOTALLY made my day. So hilarious.

    ReplyDelete