Life is...

 Back to school:

 

Kami is in 3rd grade. Which is impossible. And scary. And she is gorgeous. Naturally.

 Don't ask me about this face... I have no clue... maybe he's a tough guy?

Cooper is in 1st grade. And he LOVES the cafeteria!

Other odds and ends:

We have a dog, he's still fat. And he barks at people for no reason other than to give me stress and anger issues.

Bowens are great!

Anatomy

Two mornings ago Cooper constructed a masterpiece of cow anatomy from playdoh and a citrus squeezer (not sure if that is the technical term). I then sent the following picture and text message to my husband (who was away on a business trip) and one of my favorite friends, Gwen (who was a natural first choice because her husband owns a dairy)

Text #1:

"Look Mom, I made a cow penis! 

...

They should call these milk penis's because they are penis's that give milk. 

...

Instead of udders."

Someone should really stop laughing long enough to teach my son the anatomy of a cow.

Text #2:

I would post it as my facebook status except it requires the repeated use of the word penis. And in light of recent events  I feel to do so would confirm that the Bowens are on a fast track to spiritual destruction.

(Brandon's facebook status was hacked and "he" was repeatedly stating that a picture of a very buxom woman in her underwear was "awesome")

A Big Wet One

I posted this as my facebook status. But my Mom continually informs me that the blog MUST be updated. Enjoy!

Along with learning how to walk this last month, Max has also learned the art of kissing.

It's a big deal in the Bowen household soley based on the fact that we aren't exactly known for our overly expressive children. ;)

Not only can Max now effectively blow kisses, he can also full on maul your face with his drooling open mouth headbutts. 

Also known as kisses.  

(he gets it from his dad)  

Super adorable and pretty messy. 

The following make-out session happened tonight.

Allow me to paint for you a mental picture.

Brandon was laying on the carpet in the "nursery" (We have a nursery now. As in an entire room whose soul purpose is to sleep the baby. N.B.D. WHAAAT?!?!) Max was having the time of his life using his dad as a human sized jungle gym. And he was feeling extra loving; repeatedly planting huge slobbery kisses all over Brandon's face.

One time in particular the kiss was extra slobbery (coincidentally it coincided with a Daddy, Mommy, Landon, and Max dog pile)

Come to find out, all the extra liquid in Brandon's mouth was not slobber...

How does one put throw up delicately?

You probably don't huh?

...

So baby blew chunks in Brandon's mouth. 

...

I'm still dry heaving over it.

Landon, in witnessing his mother's distress, offered to get me a napkin to throw up in. Upon delivering it he offered the following logic:

"You know Mom, if you're going to throw up, it would be best if you did it in the sink."

ps Mom, you had to have known throw up would be the thing to bring me out of blogging obscurity.

May 7, 2012

Tonight for FHE we played outside in the dirt.

Brandon was a weeding machine and when he was all done he planted my peonies (I hope they grow!).

Max tasted dirt for the first time (okay, honestly, we are in the middle of a renovation and so Max probably tasted dirt for about the bazillionth time)

A cute little Hispanic lady happened to walk by our house and she was enamored with our baby. He was clad in only a diaper, sitting in the flower bed, and drooling dirt.

"He's so cute!" she said in her broken English "Go get your camera and take a picture."

She was the cutest!

Also, she was very smart and so I headed her advice and got out my camera and took a picture (or a thousand)

 

A farmer in the making.

 

The face that started the madness

And we know Landon's got to get in on this... (however, he was done after one picture)

 Kami has decided that blowing a kiss is the ultimate best pose to strike for a picture.

 I, however, prefer this smile.

Kami was striking poses for the camera and Cooper had to join in. 

This is BY FAR my favorite shot from the evening! 

He kills me!

 

Of course, he couldn't stay "serious" for long.

In fact, it's nearly impossible to get a "normal" picture of this boy.

Exhibit A.

Exhibit B.

 

...and C.

 

and D. (also known as "the ghost: OOOO!")

 

 

Want to know where he gets it from?

ShaZam!

 

Handstand.

 

Blurry deliciousness 

(and no, I don't believe in wiping my children's faces... or combing their hair... thanks for asking)

 

And that was the sign we had had enough....

 

In the words of Cooper:

"PEACE OUT!"

 

Mischief Max: a Children's Tale

Once upon a time in a very remote land there was a small little house with a dill pickle door. This small little house contained several funny creatures. Most notable (for this story in particular) was a small little boy. A baby, to be exact. A baby named Max.


There wasn't much to Max by way of size. In fact, of all the house creatures, he was the littlest. Even the dog outweighed him. He was a runt, if you will. But what he lacked in girth he made up for in seduction and appeal. You see, Max not only was smaller than most, he was also far handsomer than most. A trait to which you will soon see he was expert at employing.


But we will get back to that. Besides being blessed with innate charm and charisma Max had several other talents at his disposal. First and formost, he was a fantastic drooler. He held the record for the most ear infections in a month. And, he could wiggle his way out of any pair of pants, even skinny jeans.
But, it was mischief Max was best at. Max was a very clever boy. He knew where his strengths lay. For starters, he was tiny, and so he could maneuver in and out of tight places. He was quick, it only took him seconds to reach any given target. He had recently learned that by standing on his haunches he was far taller then he was on his kneecaps. And he could be stealthy quiet like a mouse or ear splitting loud like a siren. Best of all, as we've mentioned, he was ridiculously good looking and so could charm his way out of nearly any situation.


I found this post saved in my archives. Obviously I never finished it. But I'm posting it anyway. Maybe one day I'll remember the story I had set out to record. ;)

That Sneaky Max

Baby couldn't be expected to sit patiently in his high chair when there was cake to be had.

Touche

Today as I dropped the two learners off at school I showered well wishes on them as they climbed out of the vehicle.

To Cooper:

"I love you bud! Hope you have a good day. Make sure you use that good math brain I gave you!"
(Cooper is learning his addition. He really loves it. And, I have to say, his thinking face is one of my absolute favorites. Such a handsome kid.)

To Miss Kami:

"Kami. I love you. Good luck at school today. Have such a great time."

Kami decided to join in the well wishing and had some encouraging words for me as she unloaded.


"Thanks Mom, love you too.
Good luck cleaning the house today!
...Have fun with that."

Well played daughter.

Well played.