Dear Muffin,

You need to know the following.
I like how you smell. It's comforting, and very boy, and it makes me feel safe and home. (Let's not confuse how you smell clean, with how you smell dirty. Dirty boy is not a pleasant smell. Just ask Landon or Cooper...) I like it when you hold my hand, I feel like your girlfriend, and that is a feeling I definitely like. I like it when you bring me home balloons or flowers, it makes my heart feel super giddy, and my eyes kind of tear up. Which is a good thing. I like it when you take pictures with me and we can pretend that we are lovers on a fantastical journey. because we are. I love to watch you play with our kids, they absolutely adore you. So do I. I like your smile and your laugh, they are very handsome. You are very handsome. Some days I glance over at you doing nothing in particular and I think "What a hottie! I wonder if he'll go out with me?" I like your fairy leaps and your dancing. You have mad dance skills. I think we should bust them out at the next stake dance. It would be legendary. People would be talking about it forever. I DO NOT like tiger safari. This is not a joke, it's honest to heaven truth.
I like that you make me happy. I like that you make me better. I like that you're patient with my "not better".
I like that you asked me to marry you. I like that I said yes. I like that it's been 6 years. I like what we have created together. I like our potential.

I like you.
I really like you.
I practically love you.
I absolutely love you.
Happy Annie-vair-surry.

Let's take a walk down memory lane, shall we:

Osgrr, the engagement puppy.The engagement photo.

Now for random Wedding Day Palooza pics:

Welcome to the Real World.

Please note the following:

• When your children ask if you (they) are going somewhere because you ask them to get dressed out of their pajamas...
• When your son chooses to eat his breakfast directly out of the saucepan instead of out of his bowl on the table...
• When your daughter asks you if you are putting on makeup so daddy will like you...
• When your youngest (who is 18 months) approaches you with the shaving cream and repeatedly attempts to put it on your legs... (hmm, I wonder if someone should shave...)
• When you potty trained son (YAY!) insists on wiping his own bum and you are left wiping unmentionables off the toilet seat everyday...
• When you are going through 3 times as much toilet paper because of a fore mentioned situation...
• When your children think the word poop is funny and so they include it in every one of their knock knock jokes...

Well that, my friends, is when you know that you have arrived.

You Just Got Schooled

Here it is: the legendary post I've been dreading for a year now.
Let's keep it simple. Kameryn started school on Monday. Mom started crying last week. Mom hasn't finished crying yet. Mom is not a crybaby.

Kameryn, of course, has been so stinkin' excited for the last month. Saturday she recieved a letter in the mail from the school fairy saying that she noticed it was time for her to go to school and if she would leave her backpack by her bedroom door Sunday night the back to school fairy would leave her some goodies. (click the picture to make it bigger if you would like to read what it says)

So, of course, first thing Sunday morning Kameryn's backpack goes right in front of her door. She was so excited she even drew a picture at church of the back to school fairy and her. (with her backpack of course) Notice how her arm is wrapped around the back to school fairy.

Then all day after church she kept asking me when it was going to be bed time.

Sure enough, Monday morning Kameryn woke up to goodies from the school fairy.Monday was orientation. First day of school but not "for reals" I kept telling Kami Tuesday was the first real day of school and she said "So was Monday fake school?"

Here she is on the front steps with her backpack. She has been begging to wear that little pink shirt since we bought it (it has a butterfly on it) So, there you go.I've smudged out our house numbers, safety first, but you should come see them because they are brand new and rockin' awesome. So is our mailbox, thanks for asking.Kami had a complete meltdown orientation day when she realized I wasn't going to talk to the bus representative so she couldn't ride the bus home. (We live three blocks from the school...)

Tuesday (yesterday) was her first official day of school. (My turn to pick the outfit. We are taking turns, her one day, me the next.)

mommy, straight out of the shower (yes Kadon, I do shower. Probably more frequently than you do.)Isn't she just a doll?!So Monday, we loaded up the whole family (minus daddy) in the stroller and walked the girl to school. My little independent girl wouldn't even let me say goodbye. She told me "Mom! I have to get my backpack I have to go!" Then she ran into the classroom without even a sideways glance at me or the teacher. I only cried halfway home. I had to keep telling myself to just pretend like it was a playdate with a friend.

As soon as I mentioned it was time to get ready to go pick up Kami, however, Cooper jumped up and ran out to the stroller. He kept calling to me "Mom! Let's go. We have to go get Kami!" So I'm pretty sure he missed her.Landon napped the whole time she was gone and so he didn't even notice her absence.
Kami kept us entertained the whole way home with stories of apples and gingerbread men, sitting on the carpet and new friends. And then something about someone getting stung by a bee (sad). She had a great time and is so excited to go back today.

Kami's first school paper. Look how cutely her little name is written at the top. Curvy letters and all.

We will adjust. Right now it just feels like a waiting game. Wait until 11:45 to take her to school. Wait until 2:45 to go pick her up... Hopefully we settle into the routine soon so I can start feeling like I have time to accomplish things during the day. And, hopefully soon the excitement will die down. I'm comparing the atmosphere in our house right now to pre-Christmas meltdowns. Poor girl (me, not Kami)

Also, Kami wanted her picture taken today as well. She said her Grandma would like to see her.

There are Times.

Being a mother is hard sometimes. Being a homemaker is hard sometimes. Running a home is hard sometimes. And sometimes, doing all three really sucks (pardon my language)

There are days when it feels like no one appreciates what you do. There are days when it's even worse and you feel like no one respects what you do. And you're just tired. Tired of the messes that appear instantaneously in the exact spot you just cleaned. Tired of the screaming, and the crying. Tired of feeling like you want to scream... and cry.

There are times when you wish that just once someone would show up unexpectedly at your house and it would be clean. Just once. Instead of people always showing up when it's not. And you laugh it off, and you apologize, but there are times you think "I bet they don't believe me when I say it was just barely clean."

There are days when you are tired of people judging you. Tired of thinking people judge you. Tired of worrying about what others think. There are days when you're tired of judging yourself.

There are times when you wish time would just slow down and let you catch your breath. There are times when you wish time would slow down and let you keep your little girl , just right here in this little moment. And then there are the uncountable times when you wish you could just go back and do it all over again, but this time do it better. Do it the way you thought you would do it before you got in the way. Be the mom, the wife, the home maker you thought you were going to be, instead of the reality of the one you are.

There are days when it just all boils to a head, all the stress, all the frustration, all the fatigue, all the loneliness, all the insecurity, all the guilt... yeah, all the guilt.

I'm just saying, sometimes there are those times. Sometimes.
And sometimes, it's comforting to know that others have those times as well, because other people do.
And maybe they don't.
But I know that there are times that I sure do.

Little Letters

Dear Ornery Child,
I don't think it is fair that you wake up on the wrong side of the bed and then I have to deal with your shenanigans. So, don't be surprised when I put you right back in your bed.
... and also, throwing a can of Pepsi at me, so not cool little boy.

Hugs and Kisses, mommy

Dear pesky annoying fly,
You've been flying around my head for the last 15 minutes. Please land so I can kill you.

xx

Dear Husband,
I love you. Thank you for cleaning the vast amounts of throw-up we experienced this week. That makes you awesome.

- Love, wee-fay.

which reminds me:

Dear throw-up,
We are not friends, and I would appreciate it if you didn't come to visit again. FOR A VERY LONG TIME!

With pure, unadulterated hatred, Not amused.

Dear Beautiful New Bathroom,
I love you. You were worth all the blood, sweat, and tears. (And the Stacy London hairstyle that lasted for a week.)

Sincerely, Pleased.

My dear miss Demi Lovato,
I desperately want to go to your concert but my husband thinks I am too old. I'm not too old huh? It would be fun huh? Please call my husband and tell him it would be fun. Thank you.

Signed, Elderly and Uncool.

Dear school,
I think you are evil and I would appreciate it if you stopped luring my child to you with thoughts of friends and learning. Just not cool. Keep your business to yourself and leave me my daughter.
P.S. I'm sorry if this is harsh, I'm sure I'll like you better in a couple years.

-Despair

Dear Husband, (you get two because I love you so much)
Tiger Safari is not a good activity. It's a good thing you are cute and easily forgivable. Also, I miss you. Please come home.

Sincerely, Traumatized.

Dear Home Appraiser,
Please agree with me and think my home is adorable and worth millions of dollars. We would really like all our dreams to come true.
Also, I would appreciate it if you would ignore the leaky basement and the garage roof.

- George Washington
(do you get what I mean...)

Worth Remembering

I came across this scripture the other day in my scripture study and I just thought it was too awesome not to share. I've been wanting to share it with everyone. The last line, is my particular favorite.

2 Nephi 29:12-14 (emphasis added)

"For behold, I shall speak unto the Jews and they shall write it; and I shall also speak unto the Nephites and they shall write it; and I shall also speak unto the other tribes of the house of Israel, which I have led away, and they shall write it; and I shall also speak unto all nations of the earth and they shall write it.

And it shall come to pass that the Jews shall have the words of the Nephites, and the Nephites shall have the words of the Jews; and the Nephites and the Jews shall have the words of the lost tribes of Israel; and the lost tribes of Israel shall have the words of the Nephites and the Jews.

And it shall come to pass that my people, which are of the house of Israel, shall be gathered home unto the lands of their possessions; and my word also shall be gathered in one. And I will show unto them that fight against my word and against my people, who are of the house of Israel, that I am God, and that I covenanted with Abraham that I would remember his seed forever."

This scripture is talking about how all the different people have kept records of the Lord's dealing with them, and how one day they will all be brought together and we will be able to see that all of these different records from different groups of people are all about how the Lord has remembered His people, how the Lord has remembered us.
covenanted = promised.
The Lord promised to remember us.

Isn't that just that best feeling ever?
The Lord doesn't break His promises. The Lord remembers us. He remembers us as a people, and he remembers us as individuals.
How neat is that?
The scriptures bear testimony to us that there is a God and that He remembers us. I know that is true. I know that the Lord remembers me because I have seen it in my life. I know that the Lord remembers my children, remembers my family, remembers my friends... that is awesome knowledge.

To read more of the records of the Nephites go here.

We've Only Just Begun...

I spoke too soon. Apparently we've booked an extended stay at the wonderful land of throw-up, complete with late night benefits.
Multiple middle of the night benefits.
And let me just say, Kameryn wasn't nearly as clever with her comments when she was the one covered in throw-up.
Fun times.
By the way, Cooper has much better aim then his sister.
Apparently she thought the bathroom toilet was located on the opposite end of the bathroom. (and that it periodically moved to her bedroom carpet.)

Yet another trip to the wonderful land of throw-up...

My favorite place to visit.
Today's visit was made especially enjoyable due to the circumstances. Lets just say that an enclosed truck is not my favoristest place to deal with throw-up, especially when there are still 10 minutes to go until we reach home. (However, as Brandon pointed out, in our truck is much better then in the aisle at Walmart)
Another plus was the fact that every time I mustered up the stomach strength to look back and ask him if he was okay he threw up again.
This happened 4 times.
(Fortunately, I didn't make it a fifth.)
And finally, Kameryn added just the right amount of extra spice with the following comments:

"Mom, look at me, every time I look over at Cooper it makes my face do this (enter face contortion into gag reflex.) I think it might make me throw-up" - I think it might make me throw-up. Remember this time, fake throwing-up is almost as bad as real throwing-up on my weak stomach
and my personal favorite,

"Mom, I have an idea, let's play a game. Guess which boy is sitting in his chair with throw-up all over his lap?" Fun game.

Oh the wonderful land of throw-up...

might I just add, chalk this up to another reason my husband is the best in the whole world.
I love you baby. You are my knight in shining armor.

mac. n. CHEESE

Sorry for the blurry pics, but they are just too cute to be worried about pixel quality.

I asked Landon if he wanted to take a picture with me and he stopped his busy mess making plans to "pose" with his mommy. Except he was too busy cheesing it to worry about making sure I got in the picture. But, he said cheese every time. He's so cute. And, might I add, my only child to ever say cheese (let alone smile) for a picture before the age of 3.

He did finally pose with me, unfortunately I clicked sooner than I smiled. Landon, however, never missed a beat. He is by far the easiest child to take pictures of. Look how cute he is.

Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous

My sister KeiLani came out 2 weeks ago and decided to spend a portion of her summer with us. She left on Saturday. Obviously she had had enough of us and all disillusions she had of how amazing I am have been shattered. I'm not sure she reads my blog, because if she did, she would have known what she was in for.
Poor sucker, never saw it coming:
KeiLani's first real day at our house we made bubble prints, did our chores, played on the "water slide" and all amounts of awesomeness (I must say, I was off to a good start.) The very next day KeiLani left with my husband and the youth of our stake on a 17 mile bike trip.
Now enter the real world: day 3, right before we were to leave for my cousins wedding reception, Cooper took scissors to his hair, which resulted in a quick buzz job 10 minutes before reception time. (Subsequently Cooper continued to nick little pieces out of his hair the entire time she was visiting.) I managed to find the scissors but was unable to locate the hair until the next morning when KeiLani was skilled enough to drop her breakfast burrito in it.
Appetizing.
Thursday, day four, well lets just say this is when my children hit their stride. Fortunately for me I have an eye witness account in KeiLani, otherwise you all would never believe such horrific things could happen to a person as nice as I am.

Believe it people.
My children are no respectors of person.

Let's start at the beginning of the day, shall we: 8:30 am, Cooper, while carrying around 2 random eggs that would have been used for breakfast, drops an egg on the kitchen floor. cool. He then hands the other egg off to Landon who uses a spatula and goes machete style on the raw egg.... on my living room carpet. super cool.
Poor mother (me) is trying to spend the day getting my chores done (poor KeiLani didn't realize chores and dinner making was pretty much all I did all day. Sorry I'm boring...) While said poor mother is cleaning the bathroom...

Stop reading now if poop disgusts you.
you have been warned.

Landon sticks the toilet brush in the toilet, full of his sisters poop (Kami has a phobia about flushing poop down the toilet, I don't get it, but it grosses Brandon out.) Then he uses the toilet brush to "scrub" poop all over my bathroom floor. When his mommy freaks out (naturally) and takes the brush away, he bends down and smears the poop around with his fingers. much better. While poor mother is scrubbing up poop, Cooper uses the opportunity to squish grapes all over the living room carpet. nice.
At this point KeiLani just shook her head and called my mom so they could both laugh at me.

I have several more highlights and I'm sure KeiLani could add her mortification to this list, however, since it is getting long, and we haven't even made it to the end of week one, (It now makes perfect sense why KeiLani was calling mom in tears by Sunday, I'm so sorry.) I will just conclude with the one that sticks out in the forefront of my memory at this current moment.
Kameryn, while trying to emulate her brother, urinated all over the toilet and bathroom floor. It was an emotionally trying talk when we had to explain to Kameryn that girls just couldn't pee standing up like boys... poor girl. She was completely devastated.

So, as you can tell, it doesn't take a genius to see why KeiLani hightailed it out of here as fast as her little legs could carry her. We did have some promising moments where I almost proved I was cool, but unfortunately, with my track record, I just couldn't muster up a believable enough front.

KeiLani, we love you.
We understand if you never want to speak to us again.

Birthday Shenanigans

The day is young and yet, it is already time to blog about the birthday. The birthday fairy was up late into the night hanging banners and blowing up balloons, so she is a little sleep deprived. But I'm sure it was all worth it to hear the birthday girl squeal with delight and run from room to room. Up bright and early, you would have thought it was Christmas; "Mom, come look in my room! Mom, come look in the puppy porch! ... "
My favorite, however, was Cooper. He woke up a good 15 minutes after Kami. But, the second his eyes popped open he screamed "Kami! Come look in your bedroom. IT'S YOUR BURDAY!!"
Hilarious! The balloons are worth it every time. The kids just can't get enough of them.
Kami, of course, wanted to open her presents first thing. And.... Surprise!... she got littlest pet shops. (Who would have thunk?)
Enjoy these first "couple" pics of the birthday girl. There will definitely be more to come. (She gets to go to lunch with her dad, and then later tonight she has some visitors coming)
Yay! for birthdays! And the favorite Auntie KeiLani is always an added bonus!
Side note: Check out the newest birthday banner KeiLani helped me make yesterday. LOVE IT! It makes their bedroom look so festive. Kami was so excited to see it she could hardly hold still. I love that. Birthdays are so fun.

Holy Crap, I don't even know what to say, MY BABY IS 5!

Oh my goodness. I love my little - BIG girl so much. She is honestly such a joy. So silly. So "grown up" So completely Kameryn Grace. We are so grateful to have this day to celebrate her: all that she is, all that she does, and how much we love every ounce of her.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY GIRL!

I've created a slide show to commemorate Kami's big day. A big day she has been anticipating for 6 months now (No lie. Every day "when is it my birthday?" "when it's my birthday I want littlest petshops." "how many days will it be my birthday?" etc, etc, 6 months straight.)

For more Kameryn, since I know you can't get enough of her, check out "just a few" of our favorite Kami stories from the last 3 years (I didn't start blogging until she was 2, BUMMER - I know.)

-Paint your Bum
-Memory
-Peanut or plain
-For Kameryn
-Pantene
-Lady of the Flies
-Hide and Seek
-"Aw Day!"
-Alzheimers
- our personal Favorite Kami story of all time